So many of us are living two lives. One- on Internet and the other — ‘whatever remains from it’. There are people who spend a staggering 8-10 hrs online every day. That’s like – the whole of their productive day. Being online is fine. But how much of it is spent on social media? If it is more than an hour, there’s something wrong with you! This blog post is a humorous take on those hours you spent on FB, outraged and enraged over nothing, and 12 very simple ways of limiting social media time.
Between my 15-25 ; I used to have some 4/ 5 real good friends; who I used to spend so much ‘REAL’ time with. My energies used to get invested in impressing and having good times with those 4/5 people only. That left me with so much time to think about my real self and about my parents too. Today an average youth has to sound ‘COOL’ & ‘MACHO’ to a minimum of 300 friends in the virtual world. Kitnaa energy lagtaa hai naa ? Sachi mein …So — the per capita attention that they are able to give to each friend becomes in decimals. And still advertisers want us to believe the truth in —
‘Har aek friend Jarrori hota hai’ … 🙂 . Jaan le lo!
In the last 10+ years- Internet is the most wonderful thing that people have harnessed and tried to benefit from. Trust me — it is ROCKING. I reserve travel / hotel tickets online in minutes. Organizations have changed the way they advertise. A tweet from the CEO of COKE Intl’ – “Five years ago, social media was 3% of our total media spend. Today it is more than 20% & growing”. Companies are realizing that they better meet their customer where it exists most of the time i.e. online; rather than spending money on —‘where the customer hardly exists e.g. newspaper advts, hoardings etc’.
Online world is available 24*7. It makes the weakest of the guys feel ‘innately powerful’ ; as he can do anything there, express himself freely. For those who have understood this trick — ‘Business has become simpler to do’. 99% of my business as a Motivational Speaker comes from my website & Social Media. Internet / Facebook have amplified my reach to the youth. You are reading this post because of internet; else you might have had to travel to an auditorium in your city to listen to me/ anyone.
But unfortunately all these pluses bring with them some ‘Vish Kanyaa’ type side effects for the users especially the youth.
Pataa nahin chaltaa ; lekin jaise hi din hai dhaltaa- jeevan ka purpose -internet mein hai badaltaa aur hardly koi hai jo hai-‘sambhaltaa’.
The quantum of time that we spend on FB- if we were to do even :- ‘25% of that with our parents poking them with our love — ‘Gazab ho jaayegaa’. And the amount of time many of us are spending scrolling on Instagram pictures, makes me want to scream – it won’t make you a photographer! But keeping the phone down, going outside and taking a picture might actually help. If we try to reduce our online time, and put even 1/3rd of our FB passion in trying to reach God — trust me — ‘Shankar bhagwaan khud aake Friend request bhejenge’.
I feel pity at reading some of the FB statues of people.
- A girl had uploaded a pic of ‘Pakoras’ that she had cooked and 5 boys in her friend list wrote comments as if they are seeing the pictures of ‘not Pakoras’ ; but something else!
- A friend of mine on FB updated — ‘Life sucks’ … 11 friends had liked it. They forgot —‘He is speaking about Life’.
- My new hair cut, My new Bike (Bua’s gift), My i-Phone, my new Dress , My Puppy (She barks in English)- Khuch bhi update daal dete hain.
- Some put philosophical updates —‘Life gives us two option — something , something…’ . I am sure — such people are either in the middle of their exams or just do not implement in their lives- ‘what they wrote’. Such statuses attract fewer likes and seeing that — they themselves go ahead and LIKE it after a few hours. How CHEAP!! Haaawww Ji !
- Never could understand – uploading a highly edited picture of yours with a quote that has nothing to do with you / your life! Bhai / behen – kehna kya chahte ho !!
- Lastly- the ultimate one : ‘FRIENDS , I AM DELETING MY ACCOUNT …………. BYE FOREVER TC’ . (Shaheed Bhagat Singh waali feeling aayi naa ? )
FB has come to become that ‘Report Card’ of our school days where gets done a splendid display of ‘whatever good we do’. If we do not do good- ‘we end up displaying- ‘How cool we are’. Sab khuch wahaan pe:-
- ‘Neend nahin Aa Rahi’
- Ladkiyon ka khaas — “ I aM vErY hApPy tOdAy!!..” (Kya hai yeh jumbled paheli??
- Another thing which is very prominent from our great ‘North India side’- a photo album with cover pics of ‘mehngi waali angreji’ whiskey bottles kept there in line. All drunk guys posing in front of them and then expecting – girls will like it and write AWWWWW!!!
- A just married lady posted a pic ‘Me and my Hubby’ on a beach in Mauritius. She is wearing a 3 piece bikini but is also wearing a Chudda, Sindhoor and Mangalsutra along with the 3 piece bikini. Hubby is in his ‘Dixcy Scott (Emergency window waala underwear)’. And relatives commenting —“ Bless ya”..
- And Yes ! when the college trip went to Goa — Sandeep, Nishant, Mayur ,Maddy, Nilaya, Pandit and Aashish post a pic in their underwears ; trying to look cool and stylish as if they are posing for the ‘Male edition of Kingfisher Calendar for 2012’. Friends commenting — “Mast Pic Bhai !! “. Girls commenting —“MaCho!!”
Why? Why are you wasting so so much of your precious energy? Instead of living your life stupidly online, how about either limiting social media time (if you are using it like an idiot) or using your online time so well that you become a Social Media Celebrity!
Kitnaa energy lagaate hai naa hum FB pe. By God !! Qatal, Zehar type energy. Every comment needs to be answered. If someone praises us- we have to LIKE that comment. We so much try to be funny there to sound ‘YO ! BABY’ type of a man. Aur agar koi galat likh jaaye hamaare baarey mein- ‘uski to ….(whatever)’. Hum uski deewar mein jaake gandagi machayengay.
Isn’t all of this so superficial for the only and beautiful life that we have. Isn’t your MIND the worst thing that you can squander on your FB friend list? So much effort we put in to ‘be perceived in a ‘hero/ heroine’ way on FB. Trust me — it is a WASTE. We are not here to be ‘LIKED’ by maximum people. We’ll be so boring then – Buddy ! It will be so useless spending your years – so much on the basis of ‘praise’ & ‘criticism’ of people around you. You will begin to get a lot of attention in life only when you stop to desperately seek it. The surest way to be unhappy is to LINK life with Internet happiness. Don’t end up being average. Being extraordinary takes extra-ordinary efforts. And being online 24*7 is the most ordinary thing you can do with your time, if you are not learning anything out of it.
Read: How to Eliminate Mediocrity from Your Life
The genesis of this internet addiction is our failure to engage our mind with ‘What it should do’. Our mind picks up the ‘EASY’. At our homes; we see lesser love between parents, busyness of parents, siblings too busy themselves in their own lives: All of it leaving us with no option but to get acceptance in the virtual world. This world is open 24*7 and this world makes us feel powerful; as it allows us an easy expression of our views / feelings. The ‘LIKES’ pamper our egos and this gradually becomes a habit.
Here’s a TEDx Talk where Dr. Carl Newport asks people to Quit Social Media
Usually FB / Internet get us into the habit of ‘we giving our BEST to the world’. This over a longer run leads your mind into a ‘indescribable exhaustion mode’. You will feel useless ; over a period of time.
We end up carrying in our minds- the negative energies of so many people on internet . Their issues, their uselessness, their oddities, their comments on us etc. “Woh ladki mere baare me kya soch rahi hogi??” / “ Usne mera Update LIKE kiya; Kya iska matlab yeh hai ki who mujhe LIKE karti hai??” . We have become a bigger social worker than Mother Teresa because we think more about our friends than we think about our own lives.
This blog post isn’t all sarcasm though. Here are some really simple ways of limiting social media time and doing something productive with your life:
1) Keep 6/7 days in a month; when you will just not touch Internet. I promise — it will just not lead to constipation or piles. Personally Experienced!
I often try the internet detox. And I enjoy those times thoroughly. Lot of reading, hearty conversations, supreme focus on fitness, quality time with family and friends and much more!
2) Do utility internet. E.g. — do not update your status unnecessarily. First make one. Before posting a status — ask yourself- ‘How much useless emotion is a part of the words/ pic I am posting’.
3) Be more worried about —‘what is happening to your Life’s picture’ than your ‘Display Picture’.
4) Use internet in slots e.g. three / four slots of 30 mins each spread across the 24 hrs (This is what I do). I have to do this much — because this world is my office.
5) Reduce to minimum- the ‘swaad / chaskaa’ part from your FB/ Interneting.
6) You do not have to immediately see the WhatsApp / Facebook message / tweet beep on your mobile phone — within seconds of its buzzing. It is not the itch of the fungal infection in your groin — that requires an emergent scratch.
7) Stop making a desperate attempt to ‘Impress people’; when on Internet. You’ll see that when you stop doing this — ‘MAGIC’ will begin to happen in your life. Personally experienced!
So much of ‘onlining’ depletes the genuine energy of our soul/ spirit. Rejuvenate it by :-
8) Having an outdoor hobby. It will ‘FIT’ you up. It will balance you up. Spend a minimum of 24 days in a month in spending a minimum of one hour daily on that ‘outdoor’ hobby.
9) Jabardasti spending quality offline time with your real life friends. But then do not go and update about that on FB (e.g. Me, Chadha & Romeo at CCD )
10) Having a good ‘Reading Habit’. Read at least 3- 4 books every month. Par jyaada photo waali kitaab nahin (You know what I mean 🙂 )
11) Try, just try this – Removing all social media apps from your phone. Many argue – it’s not the solution. But it works like a charm, trust me. If you want to de-addict, you have to take such drastic measures. App hi hai, tumhari kidney nahi, jisey chhodne ke liye itna sochna pade!
12) Having a GOAL in your life; which you can die for. Once this happens — everything else will fall in place- be it discipline or FB or people issues. When you are making ‘smart progress’ in your life – the best people will automatically happen to you. Personally Experienced!
And if you are looking for some really serious but wonderful tips to fight this addiction, you need to read this: 10 Ways to Spend Less Time on Social Media and More Time with Humans
All this just for limiting social media time might look difficult to do; in the beginning. But trust me- if you do a ‘jabardasti waala Focus’ for a few weeks only — you shall surmount your addictions of the virtual world. JUST DO IT ! You just CANNOT be doing ORDINARY stuff and be expecting Extra-Ordinary Results . Add some DARE + MADness to your Life & see the Change.
If it is 1) Not on the road of your Goal or 2) is not making you a good human – ‘IT IS NOT WORTH IT‘. Get a firmer hold of the LOGIC and stop expecting MAGIC.
Your mobile / Laptop ; I agree is an educated instrument and offers you everything cool- FB/ Twitter/ Youtube etc etc… Your life too ; like your mobile is offering you so much- A chance to be ‘the best that you can be’. Choice is yours —‘You wish to pick up your mobile or your Life’.
Everyone else is on his/ her mobile / laptop. You can make a statement by being ‘with your own LIFE!
I have been writing for the past 6 years. Hope some of the blogposts will help you combat your addictions.
I know you are reading this through Facebook too. In my defense, if you are looking for an alcoholic, you have to go to the bar! 🙂 . Don’t let this analogy become the harsh truth of your life. There is still time.
Rise & Shine!
Akash Gautam
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