Have you ever asked yourself, “Am I Wasting my youth”? If not, then you are probably not asking yourself the right questions. It is actually quite easy to know. Ask yourself – ‘Are you doing the MOST important things; that you could be doing or are you wallowing in moods, temptations and distractions’?
There are distractions galore in this ever advancing world. Some are obvious while most are cleverly concealed for the understanding of a brain which is 15 to 35 yrs old. Most of us give in to those distractions & temptations just as easily as they come into our lives.
Stop. Take a moment. And think about what I am writing next:-
“If what you are doing is not taking you TOWARDS your Life Goals, it is taking you AWAY from them.”
Give this statement a hard thought and find out 5 things you do on a regular basis that are taking you nowhere. And with the limited time we have in our lives, to work on our purposes, wouldn’t it be a shame – to have wasted away most of it, gambled it away for pleasures that are momentary, ephemeral and addictive too? Social Media, Mobile Phone, Selfie addcition, Friends & their issues, Relationship issues & addictions, laziness, day dreaming, TV addiction to irregular sleep habits – the habit traps are many. How to get rid of bad habits- the practical way?
People of my age and beyond know the tremendous power youthfulness has. Having lived through it, we realize in retrospect – what amazing things we could have achieved, if only we had rerouted our focus locus to a more disciplined path. And that’s why I write this blog post. Don’t do the mistakes that your fathers repent. Youth is a wonderful time to be alive, to kill yourself working out of your comfort zone, to achieve your most huge-ass dreams. Sitting and whiling away your life won’t do it. Getting up and taking action would.
Youth is that time when you are mostly attachment free, there are not many family & money responsibilities, and you can afford to fall and learn. It is that time where you can get lost, lose yourself and then find yourself back too. But most of the youth I meet / talk to as a Motivational Speaker and Trainer, haven’t even stepped out of their comfort zones, they haven’t even started walking. All they do is – give in to the pseudo pleasures they have found by aping the western culture to the hilt. Reminds me of those lines –
“Manzil mil hi jayegi, bhatakkar hi sahi
Gumraahtoh who hainjoghar se nikle hi nahi”
(You will find your way eventually, even if you make a few detours. The truly lost are those who haven’t left the confines of their homes)
I want to tell everyone who is reading – BE AFRAID !!
Yes. I am asking you to be afraid. But of falling into the wrong traps, of wasting away this one shot at achieving your dreams. But never of failure. Every failed attempt will be a feedback. But you won’t be making those attempts if you are being too addicted to GOTs, BBs, GAs, F.R.I.E.N.D.S and hundreds of other sitcoms. And if you have to really watch them, take back inspiration, not addiction. Whatever you do, whichever habits you pick, move towards becoming invincible, unbeatable and just super-duper amazing. Strive to be the top of your field, be the expert in your area of expertise – not in partying away till wee hours of the morning and then going to work too hungover to feel the beauty of life lived in full senses.
I see so many young people – simply waiting for the weekend to drink and party away their exhaustion. How does that even work? You are not treating your sorrows. You are just handling them by keeping them at bay so that they come back more forcefully to you – next Monday. It is like numbing the pain, not treating it. Painkillers don’t make your pain disappear. They just make you forget there is pain. Don’t live your youth like you are constantly high on pain meds. They will make you an addict. Not successful, not brilliant – just an addict. To a lifestyle that is not doing justice to your being human.
The realm of the physical is not the only battleground where youngsters end up losing the time of their lives. The emotional plane is a battlefield of its own kind. Which is much more difficult to be fought. The country is currently trying to start the debate of depression, we are trying to get people to open up and speak about their never-ending grief.
But the question is – why do you have this grief? Sadhguru Vasudev Jaggi says, “If you are depressed, it means that you are generating a large amount of emotions and energy but in the negative direction.” Why would you want to live with that? That’s why this debate is important. If you find that you are grief-struck (not just sad) constantly and for smallest of reasons – please speak up. More often than not, a little support will help. But please don’t let the most precious days of your lives go up in smoke because you cannot manage your brain signals – especially when managing them isn’t that difficult.
Another aspect is that of relationship addiction. Sitcoms, movies, philosophies from people who should ideally be not allowed to talk at all – have led young people into believing that being in love with someone is an integral part of life. They couldn’t be more wrong. Why would you feel complete when you find a better (or bitter) half only? If you want love to be the guiding force of your life, don’t look for it in just one relationship. Make it the lens with which you view the world. Make it the most important philosophy of your world view. Be loving to everyone in your family and friends. Be loving to yourself, your goals, your dreams. And love with abandon, without care. But not carelessly. Love your life enough to do the right things, not give into the temptations of wrong things.
Have a massive love affair with your own life. And make that the best of your relationship. Love is a beautiful foundation. Why look for it in just one type of relationship?
In the trance of youth, people give so much time into these relationships, there isn’t much time left to make this world a better place by their unique contribution. Don’t be an addict. If you have found someone, awesome. Do not centre your life on that relationship but. The two of you look at a third thing together and create wonders out of it. If you haven’t found someone, that’s absolutely fine too. You continue being the breeze of awesomeness and the right kind of love will find you. 10 ways to Screwing your life between 20s & 30s.
Point is – never lose sight of your purpose, no matter what trials and tribulations life puts you through. It is your job to learn from them and move on. Don’t insult your human intelligence by wasting your life moping over your sorrows. People argue that it is one life only. Why not have fun and enjoy. Exactly my bargain! This is one life. Now that you have tried waywardness and indiscipline, why not try discipline and see – which works better for you.
When I ask someone what they are doing and they say, “Time Pass”, I cringe. 24 hours – same 24 hours every genius got and every loser got. The difference – the world knows those geniuses. And we all know a few losers as well ( … don’t become one of those losers. Time pass = time fail !!!
Discipline may not be the rosiest of things. But it is your word, your promise to yourself. And what kind of a person are you, if you can’t keep a promise you made to your own self? I deeply admire those young people who are committed to their passions. It needs discipline and a Himalayan will power to be laser sharp focused about – fitness, skills, intellect, achievements. Among the millions of snobbish, vain youngsters who know nothing but whiling away time in shallow pursuits, when I see a young boy / girl putting in all their heart and soul for becoming fitter, acquiring admirable skill sets by working hard and non-stop on their follies, or just changing the world with one act of kindness every day – I feel like there is still hope.
And I want to share that hope with the rest of you – who find it easy enough to just sit in front of the laptop, binge watch or go on sitcom marathons and devote all their time to the Internet. Please don’t do the easy. There is swaad in it. But not fruits. Instead choose the right. The pride that you are looking to see in the eyes of your loved ones will come when there is ferocity in your run towards your goals. To become the cheetah who outruns the lamb, you first need to stop being the lamb.
You are right. It is just one life. And at the end of the day, it is your choice as to how you want to spend your limited, crucial time here. But then – do learn to live with the consequences of those choices as well. If you choose temptations, learn to live with failure. If you choose right action, enjoy the exhilaration of 100% attempt, if not success!
In your heart; you know it well that your life is meant for something much more. Something much bigger than the mundane trivialities which are hijacking your neural framework & engineering it towards mediocrity and eventually failure. Isn’t it scary that –‘Your whole life could turn out to be mediocre or waste’?
Darling ! Stop day dreaming or chasing the latest toys. Live Well. One Life. And it is YOURS only, not someone else’s.