This is the second of the two posts on ‘Chanakya Neeti’ (Part I is here). Chanakya is one of my favourite Management Gurus. What insight that man had, hundreds of years ago! Most of the life lessons from Chanakya Neeti, written in the Arthashastra are very much relevant in today’s times as well. I have tried to make the learning more contemporary in its appeal by adding examples from your day to day living. You must read it; ‘only’ when at leisure….
Quick Reference: 6 Chanakya Life Lessons in This Post
- Lesson 7: Never make friends with people far above or below you in status — On mental equality in relationships
- Lesson 8: Learn from your worst enemies — On separating the lesson from the person
- Lesson 9: Avoid people of vicious conduct — On protecting yourself from crooked company
- Lesson 10: Beware the person who speaks sweetly but destroys behind your back — On spotting real vs fake
- Lesson 11: As soon as fear approaches, attack and destroy it — Chanakya’s teaching on courage and strength
- Lesson 12: Don’t be too honest — Straight trees are cut first — On strategic honesty
6 Powerful Chanakya Teachings on Life, Courage & Relationships
7. Never Make Friends With People Who Are Above or Below You in Status
“Never make friends with people who are above or below you in status. Such friendships will never give you happiness.”
— Chanakya Neeti
Chanakya said it ages ago and I am awestruck at the growing relevance of this truism these days. The world has a paradigm order if observed carefully. People are at different levels; classified on a lot of bases — money, knowledge, caste, religion and even inclinations.
If you observe closely, miscegenation of any kind / any relationship would only fall a cropper over a period of time. Such ‘togetherness’ succeeds most in Bollywood movies alone. Even there, they have learnt a lesson. The most important thing to consider is equality in mental status. If two people are on the same mental plane, understanding gets better and happiness comes easier. Else, most of the times, it is ego clashes, misunderstandings, problems and what not.
Sadly, people think about everything other than mental state when entering into friendships. Money, caste, religion etc. are common. Like-mindedness is often not the case!
Read more on Relationships and Emotions.
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: Mental equality is the only real foundation of friendship. Everything else — money, status, religion — is furniture. Shared wavelength is the house.
8. If You Can Learn Something Even From Your Worst Enemy — Don’t Hesitate
“One who knows not — he is a fool. One who knows and still doesn’t learn — he is a bigger fool.”
— Chanakya Neeti
There is not one being created by God who does not have something to teach us. Friends, family, and the people we know — they definitely have something in store for the lessons we learn from life. But, even lowly creatures, animals, enemies — they teach us something or the other. We just need to grasp the lesson. How does it matter if you like the person or not? If he helps you learn something, just grab the chance. The life lessons from Chanakya Neeti also won’t work if, for e.g., you don’t like me and hence can’t tolerate a word of what I say, no matter how right I would be. Don’t cloud your judgments with the veil of your fickle emotions! This is one life only.
And losing an opportunity to learn something in life is like losing a chance to live a better life. A deceitful friend will teach you the value of trust and patience before believing people. Even an ass has three lessons for every so-called intellectual human being: 1) although an ass is tired, he continues to carry his burden; 2) he is unmindful of heat and cold; and 3) he is always contented and dedicated towards his duty.
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: The best teachers are sometimes the worst people. Don’t let your feelings about the source stop you from receiving the lesson.
9. He Who Befriends a Man of Vicious Conduct Is Rapidly Ruined
“He who befriends a man whose conduct is vicious, whose vision is impure, and who is notoriously crooked, is rapidly ruined.”
— Chanakya Neeti
If you know a person to be of suspicious behaviour, if you know that person to eye things with wrong intentions, and if you know that person to be cunningly wicked — why be friends with him in the first place? Such a man will surely backstab one day.
I remember a newspaper coverage which might help explain this: a lower middle class man with a wife and a daughter. The husband always wanted to make it big. He had this friend who had all the above attributes — vicious, impure vision and crooked. His wife never liked the man and had apparently warned her husband to keep a safe distance. The man knew everything himself but did not stop — for he wanted to make money with his friend and was eyeing a partnership. Things got better financially. But one day, his friend got the chance to finally carry out his original plan, for which he had helped the man in the first place. He barged into his house when he wasn’t there and tried to assault his wife. His daughter and wife both got hurt in the struggle they had to make to escape the snake in disguise. The man learnt his lesson the hard way.
More often than not, these kinds of people befriend you for a reason. Make sure you don’t fall into the trap and make yourself go through the same hardships. Staying away from such vices is the option to be exercised before it’s too late to save yourself from the ruins.
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: You already know when someone is dangerous. The question is whether you act on what you know before the damage is done.
10. Avoid Him Who Speaks Sweetly Before You But Ruins You Behind Your Back
“Avoid him who talks sweetly before you but tries to ruin you behind your back — for he is like a pitcher of poison with milk on top.”
— Chanakya Neeti
There are many people around who sugarcoat their words for you. They are foes in the veneer of friends; speaking all sweet words that will seem so nice to listen to. If you need an example, just watch one of Ekta Kapoor’s ‘saas-bahu’ sagas. They are filled with such characters only.
One tip to recognize and differentiate between the real and fake: the one who is your real friend will talk sweet but point out your mistakes as well. He / she will not blindly like everything you say or do and / or support you even when wrong. He / she will try to reason with you when you feel apprehensive about the other people in your life, try to push you towards your family and friends — not away from them.
On the other hand, a fake one who harbors cruel intentions will simply do the opposite. He will slowly make you drift away from people and then carry out his plans. Poison being very soluble in all substances, it becomes impossible to separate. So, throw away the pitcher before you knowingly drink the poison along with the milk.
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: The real friend corrects you. The fake friend always agrees with you. Sweetness without honesty is just poison wearing a mask.
11. As Soon as Fear Approaches Near — Attack and Destroy It (Chanakya’s Teaching on Courage and Strength)
“As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it.”
— Chanakya, Arthashastra
It is very true: courage is the quality that makes possibilities and opportunities visible. Fear hides a lot of things from us — our abilities, our confidence, our strength to act. It creates a blindfold and prevents us from seeing the actual. Remember always, fear is a dark room where only negatives can be developed — and what will you do with the negatives if you don’t have the real pictures in your hands? Whenever you feel that something makes you afraid, wage a war on that something.
Never let your fears take control of you — because when we fear something, we give it immense power over us. Anything which you resist will persist. I remember reading a chapter during school days: the author had become hydrophobic after a near-death experience at the swimming pool, and it was a narration of how he overcame his fear by learning how to swim. More often than not, fear is nothing but False Evidence Appearing Real — something that is false can be conquered easily if we attack it with the right weapons. And those weapons are faith and confidence. Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death. And to learn how to destroy your fears — marks the beginning of learning life-long wisdom.
Here’s a TED Talk by Karen Thompson Walker on what Fear can teach us!
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Feed your faith. Starve your fears. And when fear arrives — walk towards it, not away from it.
12. A Person Should Not Be Too Honest — Straight Trees Are Chopped Down First
“A person should not be too honest. Just as straight trees are chopped down first, honest people are taken advantage of first.”
— Chanakya Neeti
This one is much more relevant in today’s times than in any other time. The saying ‘honesty is the best policy’ does hold true — but only when you know where to be honest and to whom to be honest. Else, the world is a difficult place to survive in. The world need not know everything about you. Deception comes very easy to certain people when you conduct yourself and your family affairs or financial matters as an open book. An honest man will never misuse your honesty. But a dishonest one will never lose an opportunity to misuse it.
It does not, for even once, mean that you should not be honest. Rather, it means — be honest, but know how to protect your roots from getting chopped off because of your honesty. Standing too straight might become a problem at times. Bending a little is good, when it comes to certain things. Be like grass on the ground when it is too stormy. Huge trees do not survive the ferocious winds. Select the storms you wish to / have to fight. Not all are worth it.
📌 Chanakya’s Lesson: Be honest — but not naive. Protect your roots. Choose which storms to fight. The grass survives where the tall tree falls.
Chanakya’s Teachings on Courage — A Closer Look at Lesson 11
The most-searched topic from this post is Chanakya’s teaching on courage and strength — so let’s go a little deeper.
Chanakya’s framework on fear is strikingly modern. He didn’t say “don’t be afraid.” He said attack it. The distinction is critical — fear is not a feeling to suppress, it’s an obstacle to charge. Three practical applications from this principle:
- Career courage: The promotion you haven’t asked for, the business you haven’t started, the conversation you’ve been avoiding — Chanakya would say you’ve been growing the fear by feeding it your inaction. Attack it this week.
- Relationship courage: The honest conversation that needs to happen — the one you’ve been rehearsing in your head for months. Every day you delay, you give the fear more power.
- Physical courage: Like the author who overcame hydrophobia by learning to swim — the only cure for the fear of the thing is the thing itself. You don’t think your way out of fear. You act your way out.
Read ’12 Wow Management Lessons from Chanakya Neeti for All Ages — Part I’
A huge part of my work as a Motivational Speaker involves writing. I have been blogging for a long time now. I have written extensively on Motivation & Living Life Better, Careers, Spirituality and other topics which I am generally questioned on during my Talks. Do go through them, in case you are looking for answers. If mine can help you, I will be very grateful!
Hope these life lessons from Chanakya Neeti help you find answers / take you out of places you are uselessly stuck in life. Do try to delve deeper into Indian philosophies. They are a powerhouse of wisdom, to say the least!
FAQ: Chanakya Life Lessons — Questions Answered
What are Chanakya’s teachings on courage and strength?
Chanakya’s most direct teaching on courage is: “As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it.” He believed fear is not a feeling to be suppressed but an obstacle to be charged. His framework — that fear is False Evidence Appearing Real — is remarkably modern. He argued that courage is the quality that makes possibilities and opportunities visible; fear creates a blindfold that hides your own abilities from yourself. The practical application: whatever you are afraid of — career risk, a difficult conversation, physical challenge — the only cure is direct engagement. Lesson 11 above covers this in full with practical life examples.
What did Chanakya say about friendship and relationships?
Chanakya had three key teachings on friendship: (1) Avoid those far above or below you in mental status — mental equality is the only real foundation for lasting friendship. (2) Beware the friend who speaks sweetly to your face but destroys you behind your back — he is “a pitcher of poison with milk on top.” (3) Never befriend someone of vicious conduct, impure vision, or crooked character — such people befriend you for a reason, and that reason will reveal itself when you can least afford it. All three are covered in Lessons 7, 9, and 10 above.
What are the important lessons from Chanakya Niti for life?
The six most important life lessons from Chanakya Niti in this post are: never mistake mental inequality for compatibility in friendships; extract lessons from everyone including enemies; distance yourself from those of vicious conduct before they cause damage; distinguish real friends (who correct you) from fake ones (who always agree); attack fear directly rather than avoiding it; and be honest strategically — protect your roots while standing upright. Combined with the six lessons in Part I, these form a complete life management framework from Chanakya Neeti.
What does Chanakya mean by “straight trees are cut first”?
Chanakya’s lesson that “a person should not be too honest — straight trees are chopped down first” does NOT mean abandon honesty. It means: be honest, but not naive. Don’t conduct your finances, relationships, or plans as an open book to everyone. An honest person will never misuse your openness — but a dishonest one will never miss the opportunity to exploit it. Know which storms are worth fighting and which aren’t. Be like grass in a storm — the grass survives where the tall tree falls. Strategic flexibility is not weakness; it is survival intelligence.
What are Chanakya’s lessons on avoiding toxic people?
Chanakya was direct about toxic company: avoid anyone of vicious conduct (Lesson 9) because they befriend you with an agenda that will eventually surface. Also avoid those who are sweet to your face but destructive behind your back (Lesson 10) — they are poison disguised as milk. His test for distinguishing real friends from fake ones: the real friend points out your mistakes; the fake one always agrees and slowly pulls you away from family and other relationships. The moment you notice the drift — throw away the pitcher before you’ve drunk the poison.
How do Chanakya’s teachings apply to modern business and management?
Chanakya’s Part II teachings map directly onto modern management: Lesson 7 applies to team building — shared mental wavelength matters more than titles or salaries. Lesson 8 is competitive intelligence — learn from rivals without emotional bias. Lesson 9 is risk management in partnerships — know who you’re in business with before you need to. Lesson 10 is office politics — identify the yes-man from the genuine advisor. Lesson 11 is entrepreneurial courage — most businesses fail not from bad ideas but from founders who don’t attack their fear of launching. Lesson 12 is negotiation wisdom — strategic disclosure beats complete transparency in competitive environments.
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