I realize that normally when anyone is made to hear or bear a motivational speaker- it can run the risk of becoming too much of an unwanted ‘Gyaan’. The reason why I promise my people ‘No Gyaan, Zero Yawn ! Events’. Self- Help that actually works. Not just the ‘WHAT TO’ Dos of life. But the ‘HOW TOs’ as well.
Just a few years into my work as a Motivational Speaker; I clearly realized that ‘Being funny is a serious Business’. In the last 18 yrs- humor, sarcasm & story telling have helped me help my audience in more incisive ways than I had initially imagined. But it is much more than cracking stupid, cliched jokes. It requires fearlessness, spontaneity, crystal understanding of audience’s emotional competencies and much more. I am 18+ now in my work. So, censor issues (which I had initially) too have been taken care of 🙂
Here are 20 extremely funny motivational quotes that are sure to make you go ROFL and maybe inspire you at the same time.
“Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they will start using it.”
“Motivational Speakers & Motivational Books are like Viagra. The effect doesn’t last long. People do not do what they know. They do what their momentum (deep ingrained habits) make them do.”
– Akash Gautam
“Monday definitely is a Man. It comes too quickly.”
– Some Unknown Woman
“Sunny Leonne’s fans and believers are a 100+ times more in number than mine. This clearly proves that the market for perspiration is at least 100 times more than the market for Inspiration.”
– Akash Gautam
“I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.”
– Groucho Marx
“Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.”
– Josh Billings
“Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.“
– Pablo Picasso
“Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead”
– Bill McGlashan
“Life is like a taxi, the meter just keeps ticking whether you are getting somewhere or standing still. So, move your ass & do something big; lest life treats you like an ass.”
“There are three kinds of people in the world. People who make things happen. People who watch things happen and people who say “What happened?”
“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.”
– Dennis Wholey
“When a man is wrapped up in himself he makes a pretty small package.”
– John Ruskin
“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”
“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”
“Smokers: Young enough to think they can. Old enough to think they shouldn’t. Stupid enough to do it anyway.”
“When you eat less, you look good in clothes. When you exercise, you look good without them.”
“Don’t accumulate fat and karma. Both are difficult to burn!”
“If we were to divert even 50% of our Social Media time to Bhagwaan Krishna; he will personally come and send us a friend request.”
– Akash Gautam
“Going to temple/church/mosque doesn’t make you a human, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.”
“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by a**holes.”
Hope some of this collection of extremely funny motivational quotes not only made you think but also put a small smile on your face. Job Done!
I believe God is a comedian, laughing at the seriousness of human race all the time 🙂 … Laugh a little more, mostly on yourself so that no one takes offence. And do spread more smiles along the way while you can!
If you have a favorite quote that always makes you go ROFL, please share in comments below.