You know which is the most useless thing inside every human being?

Your answer might be ‘Appendix’/ ‘Armpit Hair’ but you could always get rid of either of them. I’m talking about the ‘Filmi feelings’ & ‘Extra Emotions’ we all have. We breed things that need to be united with the dustbin at the first chance available!

One of them is GUILT. If you want to go on a trip, go on a Goa trip. Don’t go on a Guilt trip. It is not worth the time, effort & energy.

My work is such that it makes me travel for bigger parts of the months. Because of this — there are months when -as a father I hardly am able to spend time with my son. I have two options: 1) To feel guilty about it when I am working / travelling / trying to sleep or 2) Accept it and THEN be 100% with my son on the days when I am there at home. I choose latter as it helps me prevent myself from exhausting my mental energy from useless guilt. Unnecessary guilt is like running your car on a zero traffic highway with hand brakes on. The speed will be hardly any when you could have driven at even permissible limit of 100.

When you begin to feel ‘SORRY’ for yourself — you begin diluting your inner, hidden power. ‘Jab koi Cheez Toot Nahin Sakti ; Usko Pighlane ki koshish bhi kyun karein

Even Paramhansa Yogananda in his biography said- ‘The greatest of sins is to call oneself a sinner’.

When we make ourselves believe that we are guilty about something, that guilt becomes the shadow that doesn’t leave our side even in darkness, let alone light.

One reason why we must Not feel guilty about stuff in life is: ‘Because at that time we thought it was the best decision that we were making’. Now even if in retrospect that decision came out to be wrong- it is OK. I purchased a premium car in 2004 instead of a house. Today the same house would have appreciated some 5 times but the car has depreciated to 1/5th. I used to feel bad about my investment decision and somewhere guilty too. I decided — ‘I will not feel guilty’. It is further important to immediately pick up a lesson. Again in 2010 and 2012 temptations hounded me to upgrade myself to a more premium car but I picked up properties in both the years.

Trust me we don’t need to wear those ugly scars of guilt. Feeling guilty is useless because guilt can never be that change agent in us. It only renders us more and more useless.

Why should a lady feel even slightly guilty of spending an extra money on things of her choice like a spa treatment etc ; especially when she is already giving 100% to her family, work etc. What is the point of feeling guilty about not studying when you are already inside a movie theatre or when you are on a date? Why should you feel ashamed / guilty of studying at a lesser known college; now that when you are already studying there?

‘Accept yourself; the way you are.’ Agreed there are a million ways in which we could have been better. But trust me – there definitely are a million ways – how we could have been worse too. I am married. I travel the world and meet so many many pretty women. Thoughts of a few of them possess me. I am a mortal man. Should I feel guilty about even ‘Thinking about them’? No ! I have decided I would not. Reasons:- ‘ I could have been worst had I been sleeping around’. I definitely could have been a saint – if I were to think of all women other than my wife as ‘sisters’. I fall in neither of the categories. I am in my own category.

So! When I am not committing a sin and when I also know that no single bone in my body feels brotherly about pretty women around – then why the hell should I feel guilty! I have accepted myself – ‘the way I AM in so many ways’. And trust me – I feel lighter after doing this. A flirty look doesn’t make me feel guilty now – if I receive it or even if I give it at places of hormonal importance e.g. Airports etc. Why feel guilty – when the moment is so temporary.

You might say – ‘This Guilt only shall prevent me from becoming Shiny Ahuja one day’. I ask myself – ‘Am I at the beginning stage of becoming Shiny Ahuja because I feel less Guilty ‘?

Answer:- No ! Because by feeling lesser guilty and by accepting myself ‘the way I am’ – I am saving and hence creating an extra energy which would have got dissipated as ‘Guilt energy’ otherwise. Now I use the same energy to ‘Know myself more’, ‘Keep myself growing more’ and surprisingly – ‘Keep myself in check more’.

That Saved energy makes me a better man who thinks that he has an extra energy over others to take better decisions. Let me confess – ‘ I feel I have become a better man – after I have started feeling ‘zero / lesser guilty’ about a lot of things – that I should not be – in my daily life.

Guilt never leads to change. Hence is never useful. The moment we repent our actions and take that step to change it, the guilt changes to ‘knowledge of self’.

One of our favorite ‘GUILTS’ is our inability to ‘make people around us happy’. Trust me- it is the most hopeless guilt category. ‘Khuch bhi kar lo – ‘People around will never be Happy. Finding faults is their favorite, first reaction. So ! Better keep / save your energies for- ‘Inspiring’ the ones who believe in YOU; rather than feeling guilty about— ‘Mujhse log khush kyun nahin rehte etc etc ‘ , ‘I should have not said this to him / her…’

Chuck it!

Chuck every feeling that pushes you back in life. Make a promise to yourself that instead of feeling ‘guilt’ you will go ‘build’ upon those precious lessons and emerge as a better person. I did it. And…

I feel free…
I enjoy the moments more …
I enjoy ‘whatever is happening around me more’

I savor the taste of my favorite ‘Paapri Chaat’ in the evenings more because now I enjoy my chaat rather than feeling guilty about some mistake I did in the day a few hours back…

I broke up with ‘GUILT’ because it is- One Life! I have decided to live it 100% .

When are you? Rise & Shine…

P.S.:- You have a friend who loves his/her guilt trips: Do SHARE this Blog post on FB / Twitter. SHARING is CARING.

May be you’ll also want to read :-  5 reasons why you should INVITE Akash Gautam to your Organization/School/College

 

 

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About Author

Akash Gautam is a Motivational Speaker & Corporate Trainer in India. Hundreds of Top Corporates like Google, CIPLA, Vodafone, McKinsey & Co., Maruti, HDFC, RIL, M&M & premier colleges like IIMs, IITs, SRCC etc go to him whenever they need a refreshing, big bang impact. Write to usWrite to us to know how he can transform your Team.

  • http://www.facebook.com/mayur.n Mayur Natarajan

    Rlly awesome Sir :)

  • AMIT AGARWAL

    AKASH SIR IS ALWAYS MOTIVATING…N WAT A BLOG DIS IS…WUD SURELY BENEFIT 4M IT N TRY SPREADING DIS KNOWLEGDE 2 MY NEAR N DEAR AS WELL AS NON DEAR ONES…!!

  • Govind agarwal

    now this is called ‘relevance’ !! superlike !! see you tommorrow sir !! :)

    • Shiningme05

      awsum

  • Aamrapali

    It is a wonderful blog sir….Loved it thoroughly :) :) thnk u soooo much.

  • Ksandeep93

    super like sir….really was in need of this over cming of guilt feeling….thnks sir…:))

  • Avishekckthakkur

    aai ye blog n kal hai aapka seminar “rise n shine ” …. double dhamaka!!!!!!!!!!!! B) thankyou sir!! keep rocking the youth!

  • Anurag Rana

    Nice one…

  • Kritesh

    Great Gyaan Sir!!!! Loved it!!

  • Jitendra

    Great Sir !! Loved it !!
    I have also broke up with guilt now. :)

  • Vipul Bajaj

    thanx sir for such a nice post!!

  • Lathiajugal

    Amazing Sir ,, Superb .. the best example is Sachin sir , even after tryng his best he had to taste defeat in five world cups before realizing his Dream . Was he guilty about the past or was looking forward to play and win the sixth world cup , which he finally did ??

  • http://www.facebook.com/anuradha.agarwal.5 Anuradha Agarwal

    again a motivating article……love ur article…….hats off!!!!………best line …..What is the point of feeling guilty about not studying when you are already inside a movie theatre or when you are on a date…….i hope whenever I feel guilty abt something I just recall this article of urs….

  • http://www.facebook.com/jaiswalayush Ayush Jaiswal

    loved it :) :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/shivani.gupta.16547 Shivani Gupta

    this one was really an eye opener .. ! :) thnkuu sir

  • http://www.facebook.com/mundhra.ashish Ashish Mundhra

    salutations!

  • Umeshdhingra

    As always has been the case,another thought and action provoking blog,simply loved this reading the first thing on Friday the 13th.cheers

  • Bothraanurag15

    Another gem of a article I salute your thoughts.

  • Roopsi Aggarwal

    Sir u rock…… i was feeling so much guilt and regrets due to some reasons bt after reading this article,,i actually feel good….. Thankyou for guiding us…………

  • Anushkac88

    Just did the break up after going thru ur blog.. feeling amazing..

  • Shubham Jain

    Thank you sirji… meri guilt feeling se bahar nikalne ke liye… :-)

  • Hersheenkaur

    i salute you sir :)

  • Bibhu_injoy

    Ek dum hosh aa gya sir ji muje ab to guilt ko break up aaj hi dunga….thx

  • Umesh chouhan

    one of the best article…….thank u sir 4 this accelerator……….

  • Nikhil Bhatnagar

    fantabulously fantastic !!

    I had this guilt of not reading this post by now but now I have converted this guilt into energy by thoughts which you delivered though this post…

    This one for you Akash……Dil Say Thank You !!

  • Akshay19vit

    hello akash sir its very realistic and optimistic blog you have written it gave me new direction to work in my daily life.Thanks alot.

  • Sonalgpt25

    very nice……….

  • ashsh

    man u r awesme …..ur blogs r simply great ….its really inspiring me n making me mre confidnt than i was ….

  • sanjeev kumar

    thank u soo much sir for this article. i was really depressed coz of my girl friend before going through this article.. thanks a lot from bottom of my heart..

  • http://www.facebook.com/vvsch Vikram Veer

    Great work sir….

  • http://www.facebook.com/pratik.parate Pratik Parate

    The one about not wasting our energy in entertaining people around us and inspiring people who believe in us… was really good…! Thanx for this…
    And I love your posts.!!

  • Abhimanyu lal

    ok….”guilty” ye kya hota hai.

  • santosh sharma

    very nice message….

  • Vivek Vyas

    aur break up ho gya ! it hits the Bulls Eye. Akash ! Good job and Thank You. :)

  • urvi chauhan

    i was depressed abt dis stuff!! but after reading ur article me cheered up !!Its soo true..
    “”One of our favorite ‘GUILTS’ is our inability to ‘make people around us happy’. Trust me- it is the most hopeless guilt category. ‘Khuch bhi kar lo – ‘People around will never be Happy. Finding faults is their favorite, first reaction. So ! Better keep / save your energies for- ‘Inspiring’ the ones who believe in YOU; rather than feeling guilty about– ‘Mujhse log khush kyun nahin rehte etc etc ‘ , ‘I should have not said this to him / her…’””

  • Aditya Mani

    If I had know the topper needs 5 hours of self study in a day, I wouldn’t have felt guilty of my limited effort, & I would have used this guilt energy to find out how preparation should be(rather than could be).

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